Human wiring sends impulses---action, along with its kin---now, hurry, go, move, decide. When the spiritual signals are deciphered we can discern the graces---rest, relax, trust, wait. It's the right thing, staying the course, waiting. We have fought the urges of human impatience and submitted to the grace of waiting. Calm and settled we must shoulder the real weight of waiting. Here is the last obstacle to peace: How long, Lord? How long?
There are many tests of our resolve. Grief is the one that's been most troubling to us for the past two years. But, there are more. You know, just about anything that stretches us or plants us at the crossroads of decision brings the crisis of belief, that instant when we cool our jets or blast forward in rush. Commitment, mission, vows, promises, responsibilities, health issues, parenting, careers, or a losing football season can be occasions that speak "wait" into our lives. So, in times of courage and spiritual certainty we put on the brakes and wait. As the seconds pile up, we're apt to ask, "How long?"
We're not the lone ranger here, you know! When Isaiah boldly responded to God, "Here am I, Lord. Send me!" (Isaiah 6:8), his next breath registered this heavy weight. He asked, "Until when, Lord" (Isaiah 6:11), the "How long?" thing expresssed in another formula of words. Throughout the Psalms King David asked the "How long?" question over and over, pleading with God for relief, answers to his prayers, some evidence of His providential care over his troubled life. The Old Testament prophets labored endlessly with a message for God's people, imploring "How long?" God would withhold His justice or "How long?" would it take for them to hear their message and respond to Him.
So, enter the blood brother of patience. That would be endurance. Paul wrote about both of them often. Evidently the people of the first century had a wait problem too, and were over-loaded by the weight of the wait problem to boot. To the Colossians, Paul wrote, "May you be strengthened with all power according to His glorious might, for all endurance and patience, with joy, giving thanks to the Father who has enabled you to share in teh saints inheritance in the light (Col. 1:11).
Patience is about overcoming the wait problem. The word used is macrothumia, two words meaning long lasting + passion. It is about keeping the flames hot, the fire burning, the water boiling. Endurance is hypomone, again two words meaning to stay under. Patience is waiting while maintaining focus on the passion or quest that has moved you. Endurance is to remain under your circumstances, and to continue to remain. The "How long?" question is answered by "keep on keeping on".
You can't carry a stop-watch into every life situation. Spiritual, emotional, or physical tests are often indeterminable. My counselor, Chip Green, reminded me often that while grief can be plotted, it is only by the designated phases, and not time. As Harriet and I ask, "How long?", we understand that the final answer is "...as long as it takes".
Two years ago I read a Twitter post that has impacted me significantly! I wish I could remember who posted it so I could thank them for a strategic lesson in the frist moments of our grief cycle. It's been shared often and many people of tiring of it. But, it said, approximately, "How do I get out of this?" is the wrong question in a time of crisis. "What do I get out of this?" is the real deal.
The real weight of our wait involves the "How long?" question. When we can shift to the greater "What is He teaching me?" in this, we may be on the path to understanding the dynamic interplay fo two graces---patience and endurance.
Now, what will He teach me today?
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