So, the financial crisis means there's going to be some belt-tightening around here. Here's how we're going to do it. First, we're going to reduce the cable bill. So, from this point forward, there will be no HGTV, QVC, HSN, the Hallmark Channel, Nickleodean, Cartoon Channel, Disney Channel, health TV, CNN, or Discovery. ESPN and ESPN 1-5 are considered essential to national security so they'll stay, along with the Military Channel, History Channel, Fox News, NASCAR channel, Golf TV, and The Western Channel.
The food budget will be trimmed as well. Starting Saturday there will be no more brussel sprouts, kumquat, tofu, quiche, yogurt, decaf coffee, strawberry cola, or mint ice-cream. Some of the other frills will be sequestered also: manicures and pedicures will take a furlough, as well as baths every day, toothpaste, most make- up products, and there will be a moratorium on purchasing pocket books.
Because all of us most carry our part of the financial burden, I have decided to forego my gym membership, getting my gums scraped, eating spinach dip, construction of a new back deck, wearing deodorant, and taking my gas pills each day. We're all in this together and must make sacrifices toward the greater good. For this reason I have also decided to pass on our season tickets to the ballet and symphony, and weekly visits to the mall. It's tough, but someone has to do it.
All said in jest as Congress enrolls us in the health care disaster but gives themselves a pass. It's more of a joke that the cartoon pictured above, or my silly imaginings.
But, it is something to think about. So, think about it.
Then, call your congressman and tell him or her what you think. If you don't know how, go here. And, if you don't call them, stop whining.
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